Black Holed Heart

J. L Blackstone


Love has left your eye

And the fire went out,

like a fading star,

like my black holed heart,

‘Love has left your eye’ ~~ Titiyo



He awoke to the feel of moisture at the bottom of his spine. Blair turned over, “did you just kiss my back?”

Jim nodded, “Have a problem with that, Chief?”

Blair shook his head sleepily at the playful tone and laid his head back down on the pillow he was hugging. He soon fell back into a doze, the feel of hands gliding down the sides of his hips and down the back of his thighs merely enhancing the sensual state he was in.

The melody of a plastic wrapper and the squeak of a tube blurred into the dream. He sighed softly at the feel of hardness pressing against him, nuzzling the pillow at the slow glide inside him. The slow, leisurely strokes, the brush of legs against his, all melting into the river of pleasure that was bathing his body, causing him to harden.

Jim came with a soft murmur against his neck, the slow withdrawal as delicious as the entry. Only half aware of the sounds of Jim getting rid of the condom, the dipping of the bed, the hot feel of a warm hard body against his back. Blair quickly grabbed the hand that was reaching for his erection and pulled it up to his chest. “Don’t want it to end…”

He shivered at the answering kiss on his shoulder and fell back to sleep.


The sweet smell of…marmalade woke Blair the next time. The beautiful blue eyes opened to the wonderful sight of a breakfast tray full of eggs, pancakes, bacon and toast. The smell that that had woke him permeating from the warmed marmalade preserve in a silver dish next to the coffee on the wooden breakfast tray that was straddling his chest.


Jim laughed at the blissful expression on Blair’s face as he sat up and took a drink. It always paid to know your lover’s weaknesses…

“I could get used to this,” Blair sighed and lowered the cup with a grin. He picked up a fork and began to eat. “Did you cook all this?”

“Who else?”

“It’s good,” Blair managed after swallowing a delicious mouthful. His face became troubled as he looked his lover over, his fully dressed lover in a six piece newly laundered light grey suit that he wasn’t wearing yesterday. “What’s with the suit?” he asked, gesturing towards the clothing with the fork in his hand.

Blair’s own memory supplied the answer just as the last word left his mouth. “The reception!”

Jim quickly halted Blair’s hasty attempt to move the breakfast tray by firmly pressing down the other’s hands with his own. “Settle down, Chief. We’ve plenty of time. I had my assistant send the chopper, along with some clothes,” he glanced down at his suit, “up this morning. There’s plenty of time for you to enjoy a nice comfortable breakfast.”

Blair relaxed back against the pillows at Jim’s words. “Good. I wouldn’t have wanted to make you late. I know it’s pretty important.”

Jim sighed. “Just an opportunity for the shareholders to talk to me in person, one on one. Not real important, in the long scheme of things.”

“It is if your income depends on Ellison Enterprises financial well-being.”

“They’ll get their chance to share their concerns with me or bribe me as it will probably turn out, Blair. Don’t worry about it.” He gazed fondly at the other man, taking pleasure in the other’s obvious enjoyment of the various items of food. His lover was really quite sensual even in the way he adeptly held the knife and fork as he cut his pancakes into slices before lightly dipping it into the small bowl of warm maple syrup.

He stood and walked over to stand before the floor to ceiling window, his hands sliding into the pockets of the slacks. “Blair?”

“Huh?” Blair immediately responded looking up from his plate.

“I received an interesting memo from legal this week.”

Jim stared out the window at the cascading water. “Why didn’t you tell me?” He turned around and walked back to look down into the blue eyes which were filled with confusion for a few seconds before clearing in understanding.


Jim tilted his head and arched his eyebrows in obvious sarcasm. “You returned two million dollars and recused yourself from the remaining cases in the class action suit.”

Blair pushed the tray away with a sigh and swung his legs over to rest on the floor. He was about to get up when he suddenly looked down. “Get me a robe or something. I’m not going to have this conversation naked.”

Although the modesty surprised him, Jim strode into the bathroom and returned with a white bathrobe which he handed Blair to put on. A tiny part of him saddened to see the beautiful tanned skin he’d had been admiring while Blair ate, disappear under the white material. A small sigh escaped him as his lover tied the sash of the robe with a defiant motion in front of him as if he was getting dressed for battle. “After that night…”

“The night of the party?”

Blair nodded. “I knew, well, it was obvious that we…” He lapsed into silence again and looked down while running his hand nervously through his sleep mussed hair. “It was a conflict of interest. I couldn’t in good conscience continue on behalf of the remaining claimants without informing them of the change in circumstances. Even though only a few of them wished to hire another attorney, I still didn’t feel right in continuing. I recommended a friend of mine to them and of course after recusing myself, returned the corresponding percentage of the money from the total you paid me.”

“But you wouldn’t have compromised your clients, Blair. You would never have acted against their best wishes despite how what we are to each other.”

“I know but,” Blair sat heavily down on the foot of the bed. “It just didn’t feel right.” He sighed and stared out at the waterfall.

Jim stared silently at the solemn expression on Blair’s face and wondered at the sadness in his blue eyes. “Fair enough. I just wondered why you didn’t mention anything about it. Hey,” Jim nudged Blair’s shoulder gently. “Finish eating.”

Blair started suddenly as if remembering where he was. “Oh sure, can’t let all your hard work go to waste, right?” he asked in a bright tone, all signs of gloom mysteriously gone.

No trace of the serious man who’d been lost in thought was now visible in the young man who was devouring the food on the breakfast tray with renewed gusto. However, Jim said nothing and simply watched, hiding his worried frown behind his cup of coffee whenever the blue eyes looked up to meet his.


“So what time are you picking me up for this dinner?” Jim asked as the car made the turn into the circular drive in front of Ellison Enterprises.

“About seven,” Blair instantly responded with a grin. “So you’re not backing out?”

Jim frowned. “Why should I? I’ve meet your father before, Blair. Numerous times.”

“Uh-huh. So it’s not a big deal for you?”

“Should it be? I mean it’s not like I’m the first person you’ve brought home to meet your father,” Jim replied in a distracted tone, waiting for the driver to open the door. The ensuing silence, however soon pulled his attention back to the man sitting quietly beside him. “Blair?”

Blair winced at the question. “Well actually, um, yeah you sorta are. Yeah, you are.”

“You’ve never brought anyone else home? A girl, a guy, all the time growing up?”

“Not really.”

“Oh.” He thought about it before suddenly smiling. Jim placed a quick kiss to the tasty full lips just as the car door was opened. “I’ll see you tonight.”

The stunned gaze he could feel from behind him only made Jim’s smile broaden as he made his way into the building.


Jim walked into the third floor banquet room still filled with pleasure at the thought that he was the first person that Sandburg thought important enough to introduce to Windhom. His good mood was evident in his easy manner in greeting the various groups of shareholders milling throughout the room.

Since Caroline’s death he’d normally dread functions such as this, the numerous conciliatory platitudes more annoying than comforting. Today, however, he felt like his smile was going to split his face. He was standing by the food when a man approached him.

“Welcome back, Mister Ellison.”

He quickly swallowed the slice of honeydew melon he’d just eaten and grasped the man’s extended in a strong handshake. “Thank you, Mister…I’m sorry, you are…”

“John Hadley.”


“How much is the company going to be affect by the recent downturn in Asia?” John asked as he reached over to pick up a toothpick stuck in small square of Swiss cheese.

“As little as possible. I’ve already been scouting out alternate suppliers…It’s too early to tell you more.” Jim smiled all too aware that if the information came out what particular companies were being looked at by Ellison Enterprises that the stock of said companies would shoot through the roof. “In any event, the unease overseas will, hopefully, be simply a small wrinkle.”

Hadley nodded, his expression thoughtful and guarded.

“What do you do, John? Besides owning 35,000 shares of my stock.” Jim had recognized the man’s name from the small number of shareholders who owned a more sizeable amount of the public shares. Hadley had been a substantial shareholder in Ellison Inc. for over ten years.

“I work at the firm Carter, Lewis, Phillips and,” the blond man paused, “Hadley.”

“Congratulations. I wasn’t aware that George had promoted anyone new.” George Carter, more like Uncle George, considering how often the man had been over discussing legal business with his father over the years. George was a hard man to impress, Hadley must be good. Another man joined them and asked him a question about the proposed marketing plan that was due to be released in the next several months.

Jim nodded. “Excuse me, Mister Hadley,” he said before allowing the new man to draw him away.


The door opened just as Blair raised his hand to knock. “Wow.”

Jim smiled brightly at the stunned tone. “I take it you approve.”

Blair nodded. “I thought you looked sexy the night of the party but now, I’d definitely have to say grey is your color.” He took another long admiring look up the tall form standing casually in front of him. The black slacks hugged the slip hips perfectly, accenting the muscles in the firm behind which was begging to be touched. The black and grey shirt fitted closely but not too tightly over the broad chest, the pattern drawing one’s eyes down to the fitted flat waist and down further…

Blair swallowed, “How about we--”

“Stop.” Jim held up his hand and reached back to grab his coat and keys which were hanging just inside the door. “We’re not blowing off tonight’s dinner with your old man.”

“Oh come on, Jim. You know you’d rather I blow you.”

Jim stuttered, speechless, as they walked down the hallway towards the elevator, his mind stuck with the image of the Blair’s full moist lips around his cock on their way down to the first floor. “I’m going to get you for that,” he finally managed as they walked out of the elevator.

“I look forward to it.”


“Are we going to stand out here all night?” Jim stared at Blair’s profile, the porch light from above them throwing sharp shadows across the tense handsome face.

Blair glanced sideways, seemingly startled at the reminder that he wasn’t alone. He raised his hand and knocked, ignoring Jim’s raised eyebrow.

“Master Windhom,” greeted the formal butler who opened the door mere seconds later. “Please come in.”

The two men stepped into the foyer, their eyes immediately drawn up towards the brightly lit chandelier glittering at them from above, along with a sense of foreboding.

“Son of…” Blair cut off his curse. “Charles, where are we having dinner?”

“The formal dining room, sir.” Charles closed the front door. “May I take your coats, sirs?”

Jim handed his coat over to the man, his attention on Blair who was in the process of removing his own coat to reveal a…silk collarless dark grey oriental-style jacket that covered a deep sapphire blue tunic that matched his lover’s beautiful eyes perfectly.

He swallowed as his eyes narrowed in on the beautiful mouth, remembering what they had offered earlier. The light from above brought out a multihued of red and gold throughout the mane of long curls, making him want to run his fingers through it, preferably while they were lying in bed together, not standing in a foyer about to dine with Blair’s father.

Blair looked up at Jim’s sigh. “Something wrong?” he asked his co-defendant.

“You look wonderful tonight.”

The smile that the beautiful mouth formed at the compliment rivaled the brightness from the chandelier above. Blair’s blues eyes twinkled as he threaded his arm around Jim’s waist, pulling him closer to his side and tilting his head up.

Jim lightly pressed his lips to Blair’s, all too aware of the butler’s disapproval as he did so. He drew away slightly with a smile on his face, laughing softly at Blair‘s amused expression. “I think we’d better go find your father.”

“Why? Afraid I’ll ravish you right here?”

The very vocal clearing of a throat prevented Jim from responding.

“This way please.”

Jim and Blair shared another quick smile before they separated and stepped forward to follow.


Paul Windhom stood as his son and Jim Ellison entered. “Good evening, gentlemen,” he greeted them with an accompanying gesture with his hand indicating for them to join him at the dining table.

Blair raised his left eyebrow at the seating arrangements but said nothing and sat to the right of his father with Jim taking the seat opposite him.

Paul waited for his son to say something for a minute about the unusual seating arrangements considering the large table. He had instructed that both men be closely seated on either side of his, instead of further away as proper for such a formal setting. His eyes unconsciously flicked toward the table directly opposite, a sinking sadness filling him at the empty chair.

“Are you all right?” Jim softly asked.

“I’m fine.” Paul smiled politely. “So, Jim how does it feel to be back at the helm?”

“Good.” Jim smiled and glanced at Blair occasionally as he spoke. “Although, I’d forgotten how much handholding was involved.”

Paul nodded understandingly. “Yes, your father remarked how touchy the Board had become the last time I spoke with him.”

“Oh really.”

Silence fell as a woman came in and began setting out the first entrée.

“How is Bill doing on his recovery? I heard he was already out and about.”

Jim gave an exasperated sigh followed by a small chuckle. “Yes, dad put in an appearance at the board meeting this week against Doctor’s orders.”

“Sounds like Bill.”

“Yes, I was surprised he didn’t show up today.”

“Yes, Blair mentioned something about a luncheon.”

Both men turned their attention to the silent man at the table who was picking at the Caesar salad with a fork.

Blair looked up at the feel of someone looking at him. “Oh, is it my turn now? I didn’t want to intrude on you two old friends catching up.”

“Blair,” Paul began in a warning tone.

“What did you want to happen, Blair?!” Jim asked at the same time as Paul spoke. “I’m sure your father is not happy about the situation but that is no reason to not be pleasant.”

“I wanted…” Blair shook his head. “I don’t know what I wanted. But I don’t want to avoid the subject and pretend that this is just another normal dinner.”

“I think that we are all well aware of just what this dinner signifies,” Paul dryly stated.

Jim took to the older man curiously. “What?”

“My son didn’t tell you? Well, Blair invited himself here this evening, and you as well. Not that I’m not pleased to have company but it has been more than two years since he’s come home for dinner.”

“Blair?” Jim asked with a raised eyebrow.

“It’s true.” Blair turned and looked into his father’s eyes. “I was wrong…to cut you out of my life so completely. I just couldn’t deal with some things. Meeting Jim has made me remember some stuff, important things that I had forgotten, that I hadn’t wanted to forget.”

He took a deep breath and looked up from beneath his eyelids at Jim’s expressionless face before returning his attention to his father. “I’m gay and I’m here to introduce to you someone who has become very important to me.”

Blair banished the image of Patrick that sprung into his mind as he spoke.

The silence that fell after Blair’s declaration was more than tense.

Jim focused on the two Windhoms, feeling the inexplicable undercurrent between the father and son. There was something more to Blair’s dramatic revelation. Something that had nothing to do with him. He could sense that Paul’s blood pressure had risen as his heart beat faster, his face flushing with emotion as he stared at his son.

Blair had thrown down the gauntlet. Why, Jim didn’t know but he would guess that it had something to do with Blair’s disapproval of his father’s business ethics, something that they had in common, unfortunately.

He still couldn’t get rid of his disappointment in Stephen’s and his father’s part in the motorcycle fiasco. He thought his father knew how important the motorcycles were to him. His attention was drawn back to the present as his senses picked up on Paul’s muscles relaxing a millisecond before the old man broke the silence.

“Son, your sexuality is no secret. You’ve made that all too obvious in your choice of companions since you moved out.”

Blair stiffened at the hint of reproof in the smooth tone. “I…”

“Not that any of them lasted more than, what was it…a month?”

Jim frowned as he noticed Blair suddenly relax. What the hell?

“That’s in the past, Jim--”

“Yes,” Paul’s attention shifted to the man on his left. “Jim.”

Jim felt himself tense under the sharp gaze. “Sir…” he began but faltered as he glanced over and met Blair’s tense blue eyes.

Blair broke the gaze when his father continued speaking.

“Although I’m very pleased that you’ve decided to end your reckless ways, and settle down I cannot say the same for your choice of gender. However, as I’ve said I’ve been aware of your proclivities for quite a long time now.” He let out a small chortle. “In fact, it was your mother who first mentioned it when you were around ten.”

“Mom knew?”

Paul smiled. “There was very little that got past your mother, Blair. She was a remarkable woman.” The latter was directed at Jim who nodded in response.

“I wished that you would find a woman like your mother, but it seems that is not to be,” he remarked in a sad tone. “Jim’s a fine man. I’m sure he’ll make a fine father to my grandchildren.”


The wineglass that Jim had been in the act of raising to his lips fell with a crash.

“Yes, grandchildren,” his gaze quickly shifted between the equally stunned expressions on the men sitting on either side.

“We’ve only begun dating…”

“…it’s too soon.”

Blair and Jim both stopped upon realizing that they were babbling incoherently over each other in panic.

Blair took a deep breath and shoved the idea of children firmly out of his mind. “So you’re okay with us, then?”

Paul smiled. “Yes, Blair I’m fine.”

“Good.” Blair smiled at his father and winked at Jim across the table.

“So,” Jim began as he continued to mop up the spilled wine in front of him. “Shall we eat?”

“We eat.” “We eat.” Father and son answered together with similar grins on their handsome faces.

Jim laughed and shook his head slightly. If only his own father was this reasonable about the matter.


He scuffed his shoe along the edge of the sidewalk, deliberately not listening to the low voices of the two men behind him saying goodbye. A bird flying overhead caught his attention and he was staring intently at the brightness of the full moon when Blair finally walked up beside him.

“Everything okay?” Blair asked, his arms immediately moving to encircle the lean waist with his palm coming to rest upon the flat stomach.

“Yeah.” Jim peered down into the blue eyes for a long second before saying, “ready to go?”

“Yeah.” With his words Blair immediately began to move, ushering Jim with him towards the car which was parked in the drive.

Both men fell silent, the night sounds accompanying them along the path.

“So what was that about?” Jim asked after he sat down into the passenger seat, ostensibly busying fastening his seatbelt but in actuality with all his senses focused on the slim form settling himself behind the steering wheel.

“Huh?” Blair asked turning the key in the ignition, his hand automatically moving to the gearshift.

“Tonight was about more than just me,” Jim stated.

Blair sighed, his eyes focused on the road up ahead as he drove. “I stopped talking to him for about five years.”


The long dark curls shook as Blair laughed and shrugged. “I didn’t agree with him on some things. Everything for my father is black and white or should I say business. Morals don’t come into it, not for him. Some of the cases he’s handled, his firm handles. Well let’s just say, I didn’t realize how completely in the dark I was until the blindfold was suddenly ripped from my eyes.”


Blair sharply glanced at Jim’s face before returning his attention forward. “No, an intern gets all the grunt work, access to a lot of things. Patrick was just the icing on the cake. The problems with my father are longstanding…it took me leaving and starting my own practice to make him really see me. At least that’s how I’m explaining tonight to myself. I can‘t imagine him accepting my announcement so easily even a year ago. He was always trying to control me, my life, well you know how it is…constantly having his people watch me.”

“What do you mean, watch you?”

Blair snorted, and didn’t answer right away as he shifted to a lower speed in preparation of exiting the freeway. “Security is what he called it, he’d have one of people who worked for the firm keep an eye on me, follow me on dates, etc. Basically keep an eye on everything I was doing since I had stopped talking to him. The funny thing is that even though it made me mad, I didn’t do anything about it until,” the blue eyes turned toward Jim, “I met you…I don’t know why.”

“You finally grew up,” Jim stated simply.

“I wasn’t going to hide anymore.” Blair smiled and glanced from Jim to the building that he’d parked then in front of. “Am I going to be doing a drop off?”

Jim smiled, “No.”

Blair immediately released his seatbelt. “Good.” He quickly got out of the car and walked around to rejoin Jim, their arms immediately moving to rest on each other’s backs as they walked up the path to the front door of the apartment building.

Jim held the door open for Blair. “What time do you have to get up, tomorrow?”

“Ten, you?”


“As long as you leave me fresh coffee I’ll forgive you.”

Jim laughed and shook his head as punched the elevator button for the top floor.


Warmth. Softness.

Half awake half asleep. Jim was in that perfect in-between place, only barely conscious, aware that he was warm, safe, and didn’t want to move or open his eyes. Afraid that it would break the spell that he was currently under.

Waaaaa….no,” murmured Blair sleepily.

Jim smiled but didn’t open his eyes. Not yet. Not yet. He relaxed when Blair’s breathing evening out again into deep sleep. He didn’t know what time it was and didn’t care. Banks would take the 8 AM meeting when he didn’t show.

There was no way in hell he was going to leave this comfy warmth. He was still smiling when he fell back asleep.


Jim was gone when Blair finally did wake up. A bright smile broke over his face as he spotted the steam rising from the freshly brewed pot of coffee on the counter. Evidently Jim had take his quip to heart and programmed the machine before he left.

As he poured himself a cup, he also spotted his suit laying out over the back of the couch where Jim had presumably left it. For a billionaire he was uncommonly considerate. Patrick would never had gone down to the car and brought up clothing for his lover. Now he’d expected Blair to do it for him. It was just one other thing that so strikingly contrasted the two men’s personalities. He’d have to think of something nice to thank Jim for his considerateness.

His good mood lasted all through the morning. Aided by several cases getting settled, to his clients’ benefit of course. He hadn’t end up having to go to trial on the Cleveland case after all. The settlement was more than he’d expected to get for the Nathaniels in the end. Blair didn’t know if his father had anything to do with the quick resolution even if it was his firm that was defending Cleveland Industries. He’d always suspected that the mysterious roadblocks and continuances were more political than legal.

Maybe somebody had been trying to get on his dad’s good side and thought that going after him and his clients was a way to “butter” up the boss?

He was still somewhat freaked out at his father’s reaction to Jim. It undoubtedly helped that he’s from an old family. The blood doesn’t get any bluer than the Ellisons or the Windhoms for that matter. And that crack about children…he’d never really thought about having children. Had never met anyone that he wanted to have children with for that matter. But Jim--of course he would want children. Blair could sense that Jim would be a good father. He’d never pull the crap that his father had pulled, trying to control his son’s life.

A knock on the door stopped his woolgathering. “Yes?” he called out.

Mags walked in and closed the door quietly behind her. “John Hadley’s here to see you. He’s waiting in the outer office.”

Blair felt like he’d took one in the gut and from the expression on Mags face he looked that way as well. This isn’t happening. He looked down at his calendar. The next appointment wasn’t until two. So that excuse was out besides he was curious about why this sudden reentry of Patrick’s into his life. Especially his appearance of Saturday. “Show him in,” he stated as he stood and put on his suit jacket.

For a few moments, they just stared at each other, both waiting for the door to close behind Margaret.

“I’m surprised to see you during office hours…”Blair began, gesturing with his hand for his ex-lover to sit down in the chair in front of his desk.

John took a step forward but didn’t sit. Instead he began a slow perimeter around the office looking curiously at the pictures on the wall and the various oddities decorating the bookshelf that ran the length of the room. “You’ve done nice for yourself, considering…” drawled Hadley.

“…considering what?” Blair interrupted, “considering that I’m not on Daddy’s payroll, like you were.”

“That never played a part--!”

“The hell it didn’t. You can’t tell me that you didn’t get off at the thought that you were screwing the boss’ son. You probably blew your load when you found out my ass was virgin!”

“I didn’t know who you were until afterwards, so don’t play the injured party here! Do you know what would have happened if Windhom had found out about us! Blacklisted, Blair. I would have been untouchable on the West Coast!”

“So what was I then, simply the latest intern you fucked?!”

“You know you were much more than that. Hell, you were practically living at the condo and that was months before your little ‘confession.’ I didn’t end us, you did.”

“That’s right I did, so why are you here now?” asked Blair silently cursing his curiosity.

“You always brought out the best in me, Blair. I want you back.” Patrick stepped forward placed his hands on Blair’s shoulders, smiling slightly when the younger man didn’t pull back.

“I’ve made partner, Blair. I can be everything that you want me to be now.” He punctuated his declaration with a kiss to the full lips before softly continuing. “Any case you don’t want me to take, I won’t.”

Patrick’s words had sent him into such a daze that when Patrick’s mouth once again descended to press against his he didn’t fight it. The rough thrust of a tongue inside his mouth, however, roused him into motion.

He pushed at the muscular chest while tearing his mouth away from Patrick’s. “Don’t!” he spat out while he back away. Blair paced around in the other direction of his desk, towards the window to look out over the city. If the situation hadn’t been so fraught with tension, sexual and otherwise he would have laughed. It wasn’t everyday that a scene from one of your heartfelt dreams come true. Patrick was offering him everything he’d ever wanted.

Blair suddenly turned and walked back towards his ex. “Patrick, look at me.”

Patrick’s forehead furrowed in confusion as he looked down at him.

Blair stared for a long time into the green eyes before realizing that what he was looking for simply wasn’t there. Sad thing was it never would be. Hadley just didn’t have it in him. He suddenly felt lighter as something released somewhere inside his stomach and he smiled, a picture of Jim’s laughing face flashing before his mind‘s eye. “I’m sorry, Patrick.”

Patrick had stepped forward at the smile but the next statement soon wiped the confident expression from his face. “I did care for you, and if you had told me this before--but its too late. I’m involved with someone now…”

“Who?! No one---.”

Blair could see how Patrick was trying to remain calm when what he really wanted to do was blow up at being thwarted. “It doesn’t matter, Patrick. I--”

“Why are you doing this, Blair? Playing tough to rake me over the coals. This is what you wanted! You always….”

Blair shook his head, “No, Patrick. It’s over. It was over a long time ago and you know it. It was just wishful thinking--on both of our parts.” He looked down at the clock on his desk for a moment before continuing, “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have an appointment.”

“We belong together.” Patrick stepped quickly forward and grasped Blair’s upper arms. He looked down into the blue eyes and smirked.

Before Blair knew it the hands had slipped to his back pulling him forward and his mouth was once again reconnecting with his old lover’s. The overwhelming heat of Patrick’s tongue inside his mouth shot straight to his cock. He pushed Patrick away much too late and guiltily wiped the back of his hand across his mouth. “That‘s enough!”

Patrick smirked at him, the green eyes all too knowing. “Sure, Blair, anything you say, darling.”

“I don’t love you anymore.”

Pfft,” Patrick snorted, “ you can say it as often as you like, but that…” Patrick made an obvious show of looking down at his crotch before continuing, “tells a different story.”

Blair shut his eyes, not opening them until the soft closing of the door signaled the other man’s exit. He dropped down into the chair at his desk and groaned. His life sucked.


Jim hummed under his breath as he read the latest reports from Tayaki. It would take another quarter for them to break even but afterwards there would be profit. Quite a difference from the 38% loss that Ellison Enterprises was quoted in the first quarter by Stephen.

He printed out three copies. It was still in draft. Dad and Stephen needed to look over it along with Banks before he sent it off to legal. The prospectus would be rewritten twenty times by the time it got through the three men and that was before Brackett and his cronies put in their “corrections.”

Simon walked in and smiled at his boss. “You seem in an awfully good mood,” he commented as he placed a pile of papers on the corner of Jim’s desk.

“How can you tell?” Jim asked smiling as he traded out one pile for the new one.

“You were humming.”

Shocked blue eyes looked up at his vice president. “I was?”

“Yep,” Simon replied. He continued to grin as he settled into the chair opposite the desk. “Do you have something to tell me?”

Jim chuckled. “I don’t see why not. Dad and Steven have already had their shots in. I’ve met someone new.”

“Really. What’s her name?”

“His name is Blair.” Jim stopped wondering if Simon had just been polite with the question or if he didn’t really know gossip that scuttled around the office in his younger years. That he’d dated both sexes before marrying Carolyn.

Simon’s eyebrows rose up, answering his silent question. “What’s he do?”

The laugh that escaped his mouth was filled with more relief than true humor. He hadn’t wanted his impression of his new vice president to be wrong. “He’s a lawyer,” he deadpanned.

“I though you got enough of them here at work.”

Jim shrugged. “Not like Blair.”

“What firm is he with, maybe I know him. Although I don’t remember a Blair.”

“Blair Sandburg. He has his own practice…” Whatever more he was going to say was cutoff.

“What! Sandburg. Class-action Sandburg! You’re kidding me?” Simon exclaimed.

Strangely enough, Simon’s reaction only made him smile brighter. “That’s him.”

Simon shook his head and snorted. “This guy I have to meet.”

Jim frowned. “Why?”

“Any man who can run Brackett around like a horse through his paces and put a smile on your face is someone I wanna know.”

“Fair enough. Hey speaking of horses, aren’t we going to the racetrack Friday night.”

Simon nodded. “It’s the annual company’s night.” All employees and their families got into the track for free. Food and drink were provided in form of finger foods etc. It was something that Jim’s wife, Carolyn had initiated as a way to increase company loyalty. In addition to supporting the newly renovated arena thus earning Ellison Enterprises Inc. points with the Mayor and City Council.

“How about then? I was planning on bringing him along,” Jim paused for a moment in consideration, “although you might’ve already met him. He was at the Smirnoff the other night…”

“Smirnoff…” Simon managed to get out before he started laughing. “Dammit Jim, you weren’t at the party.”

Jim felt his face darken in embarrassment. “Hey, I showed…”

“…for about five minutes,” muttered Simon.

“Hey, it was half an hour!”

Simon shook his head slightly, and only smiled wider.

“They were lucky I showed up at all,” Jim stated. “I hate those things.”

“I know,” Simon replied as he stood. He had to get back to his office. “You’re copying me that?”

Jim nodded at the paper on his desk. “Let me know if there are any problems.” After Simon left he pulled out another folder unaware of the sound that he was emitting under his breath while he began to read.


Blair dragged his way down the hallway towards his apartment, his mind in turmoil. He was going to have to come clean with Jim about Patrick.

Patrick wasn’t going to let it go. But how to tell Jim, the kiss was bad enough. Guilt flooded him at the remembered heat from Patrick’s body. Damn the son of a bitch! He knew all the little tricks that made his body hum and was not averse to using them every chance he got.

Well that was the answer. He wouldn’t get the chance. From now on he wasn’t going to be alone with him. It was too dangerous. He wouldn’t accept his calls and he’d leave word with Mags to show him the door in future.

After a while he would get the hint and leave him alone. With that plan in mind he dismissed any thought of telling Jim about Patrick’s brief--or what would be--reappearance in his life. There was no need.

And it would just upset Jim.

“Hey, babe,” a voice greeted as he turned the corner.

“Jim,” Blair greeted his lover with a bright yet shocked smile. The tall man was leaning against the right side of the door in a casual stance, which only emphasized the dark grey pinstriped suit that molded against the muscled torso that he was becoming extremely fond of. “What are you doing here?” Blair asked; his right hand and arm automatically sliding around the trim waist as he lifted his mouth to Jim’s for a kiss.

“My dinner was cancelled,” replied Jim. “Thought I’d drop by, see if you wanted to go out and get something to eat…”

“Can’t. I’m going to the symphony…my friend Kenda is performing tonight,” he told him as he let them into the apartment.

“You sure have a lot of friends.”

It was the tone, not the words themselves that had him turning back to face Jim with a frown. “Yes, I do,” he simply replied, knowing that ‘friends’ wasn’t what Jim meant. He took a deep breath and exhaled in an attempt to calm himself before he continued with the conversation. “Look, Jim. That crack you made about me not knowing how many lovers I’ve had in the last year…I know I have a bad rep but you know that you can’t believe everything you hear.”

Uncertain of his reception, he stepped closer and rested his right palm against Jim’s stomach, grinning at the resulting shiver. He still had it. Blair slid his palms around to the back in a loose embrace. “I might not remember the exact number, I don’t count, man. But I’ve slept with less people than is probably in that report your father gave you. Dating is not synonymous with sex.”

Jim looked down into the handsome face, surprised once again at the irritation he felt at the mere mention of the woman’s name. “Twenty-two,” he muttered, his hands moving to mirror Blair’s. However, he stopped short with his hands resting familiarly on the shorter man‘s hips.

Blair chuckled. “Wow, man. Maybe a few years ago…when I was cruising every weekend. Does it bother you that much?” Blair looked down after asking, not really wanting to be looking into the light blue eyes if the answer was yes. Cowardice at its best he mentally mocked. He’d known his catting days would one day come back to haunt him, he only expected it to come in the form of a STD--not this.

The hand under his chin slowly raised his face until blue eyes met blue once again. “I’m not thrilled, but can’t hold having a healthy sex life against a single man in his twenties can I? I would have probably been doing the same thing if I hadn’t met Carolyn.”

After a small sigh of relief, Blair’s smile widened. “Like Vivaldi? I have an extra ticket…we can pick up something along the way. I only came home to change.” He slid his hands up the firm back while he lifted up to kiss Jim. Control of the kiss was soon lost and he found himself clutching Jim’s suit jacket while his mouth was plundered by a tongue apparently determined to demonstrate its skillfulness.

Blair moved closer, groaning when his erection met a muscular leg. He stepped back to take a breathe. “Jim…” he panted, “as much as I’d like to--.”

Jim sighed and rested his face alongside Blair’s for a millisecond before straightening. Vivaldi, huh?”

“Come on,” Blair began pulling him towards the bedroom and then stopped once he realized that it wasn’t a great idea if he wanted them to actually get out of the apartment tonight. “Wait right here. I’ll be right out,” he promised before disappearing into his bedroom.

Jim watched the energetic backside disappear with a sigh. He’d hoped to get some of that energy exerted upon his behalf but alas that would have to wait. Classical music. He shook his head sadly. The things he suffered to get laid.


Fingers scrambled to clutch the edge of the mattress as a particularly strong thrust almost pushed him over the side. Blair braced himself but the next plunge sapped what was left of his stamina. A guttural sound spewed forth before he fell flat on the bed, his head hanging over the side, not that he cared.

He was vaguely aware of the felt weight along his back following him down and the continued presence of a dick moving inside him. Short sharp jabs that sent pulses of pleasure through his now lethargic muscles.

Damn, he loved surprises.

Jim finally collapsed beside him minutes later, seemingly in similar shape.

Blair snorted into the sheet that he was only now noticing was ticking his nose.

“What’s so funny?” Jim asked his voice more gruff than he’d ever heard it, probably because of the lack of breathe.

“Just thanking the prostate gods, man.”

A shiver traveled from his lower back as a tongue licked the nape of his neck in response. “…oh yeah…,” Blair managed before he lost himself in a myriad of tingles.

Jim’s traced the lobe of the ear with his tongue, smiling against the hot flesh as Blair once again fell under his spell--for the fourth time that night.


Jim pushed Blair’s shoulder seconds before the alarm sounded. The whirling of the cd in the drive that the other man had set to wake them at nine, sounding more like the roar of an airplane’s engines to Sentinel ears.

Wha….,” Blair managed. It a was two more minutes, he was almost back to sleep when the music was loud enough for him to hear. After a few seconds he finally found the remote control and silenced the music to his relief. And apparently to Jim’s as well…

“Thank you,” Jim sighed. He rolled over and threw his arm around him before nuzzling his face into the pillow beside his head.

The next thing he heard was the low even breathing of someone asleep. Blair smiled at the head of brown hair he could see out of the corner of his eye. He stared up at the ceiling, not thinking.

All too soon, he forced himself to gently pick up the heavy arm and carefully roll himself out from under it out of bed.

He stood for a few seconds looking down at Jim before rousing himself to take a shower.


It was as he was pouring coffee into the cup he had found in the cabinet--all very logically placed--that he realized how domestic it--the situation--him and Jim were. He could picture himself living here with Jim. He gazed out over the marina wondering why he immediately knew that he would move here rather than Jim moving into his place. Well, they had technically picked it out together, he thought with a slight frown.

He was still frowning when Jim walked out of the bedroom in his boxers, scratching his butt while he gave out a huge yawn. “Should’n woke me up,” he grumbled as he poured himself a cup.

“What and miss this sight, never,” Blair teased before he moved up to stand behind the tall man and rested his chin on his right shoulder. He began to nuzzle the bare neck while his hands lightly skimmed over the firm pectorals. The nipples stiffening in response.

“Don’t start anything you can’t finish,” Jim growled, turning swiftly to kiss him hotly on the mouth.

It was several minutes before Blair managed to muster enough rationality to push away. “I’ve got to go,” he murmured into the chest he’d been deliciously manhandling just prior. He stepped away, reluctance in his every motion.

Jim nodded and let his arms fall down to hang forlornly down at this sides, a thoughtful expression on his face as he watched Blair walk away. “Do you think this will ever go away?”

Blair stopped in the middle of opening the door and turned around. He tilted his head to the side and looked back at Jim standing in the middle of the kitchen. Domestic. “This need to keep touching…”

Jim nodded.

The smile on his face broadened as he replied, “I hope not. If I can get free for lunch, I‘ll call.”

For a long time Jim stared at the closed door, wondering if this feeling was really love or merely novelty.


Blair smiled as soon as he spotted the businessman towering over the gaggle of women around him. Jim looked as uncomfortable as he had ever seen the good-looking man. Especially once the pretty limpet attached herself to his left side. A particularly pretty woman who despite her tall stature made it a point to flutter “up” into Jim’s blue eyes.

Eyes, he would bet were even now filled with annoyance. Blair had been watching from his current position, hidden behind a large lighted floral arrangement for several minutes. It had been a kick to watch Jim with complete freedom for once; to observe how his lover interacted with other people, wondering whether the chemistry that flared between them whenever they were together was shared by anyone else.

From the pulse he could see throbbing along the chiseled jaw line, it definitely was not shared by the blonde or any of the other women surrounding Jim while he did his “meet and greet” duty for Ellison Enterprises.

Deciding that it was time to rescue his lover, Blair stepped out into the open.

The polite smile on Jim’s face brightened into a real one the second he spotted the long-haired figure striding towards him. It had been days since he’d last seen his lover. Their schedules never seem to allow them time during the middle of the week. Reflex moved him to reach out and grab the outstretched hand Blair was offering but instead of shaking it he grasped it firmly and pulled him close. What came next was as natural as breathing and as such was done without thought.

It was the shocked gasps and silence around them that broke through the surge of relief that had flooded him at Blair’s entrance that made him aware that he’d done something shocking.

Jim looked down at Blair’s stunned expression. “What?” he murmured while shooting a bewildered smile at the people around them.

“You kissed me!” Blair hissed while smiling gamely around at the interested glances.

“I did…” Jim whispered, realizing that it definitely would account for the shock he was seeing on the faces of the women who’d been hounding him all afternoon--especially the annoying blonde.

“I don‘t believe we‘ve been introduced?!” the blonde demanded in a barely polite tone that even to un-enhanced hearing was approaching shrill.

Before Jim had a chance to speak, Blair spoke up, “Blair Sandburg,” and reached out his hand in greeting, unaware until he felt Jim’s hand on the small of his back that Ellison had maneuvered to stand beside him in classic couple position. He mentally groaned at the impression that it would give along with the kiss. It wasn’t like he was exactly in the closet but in the past he’d managed to keep his professional and personal lives separate to a great degree.

“May I introduce Janet…Hayden,” Jim intervened with a small smile, “Janet may I present my….”

Don’t say it. Don’t say it. Blair was silently wishing….a smile still affixed to his face.


Blair glanced up at Jim in disbelief, not surprised when he got a shrug in response. The kiss had made it a moot point, no matter how much either of them might want to deny it.

“I need a drink,” Blair announced to no one in particular. “Jim?” he called over his right shoulder after taking two steps in the direction of the bar at the other end of the room. He felt absolutely no guilt at leaving the businessman to deal with the blonde harridan.


“How are you holding up?” Jim asked as he stepped up behind Blair in one of the private owner suites overlooking the track.

Blair glanced back at Jim. “Fine. I’m chalking it up to karma.”


“Yeah, getting my ass back for all the times I’ve embarrassed my father at these things. I haven’t spotted him, thou. Have you seen him? Tall, silver haired guy laughing his ass off in a dark corner…”

Jim chuckled. “Afraid not.”

Silence fell.

“How mad are you?” Jim finally asked the question that he’d danced around voicing since he’d unintentionally ‘outed’ them as a couple with a quick kiss.

“Not really. It was unconscious on your part. I realize that,” Blair stated softly, amazed really at the complete naturalness of Jim greeting him with a kiss--a chaste one at that. Something the older man probably did a hundred times with Carolyn. The closeness between them disconcerting him once again at how quickly they appeared to be moving, although it had been four days since he’d last seen Jim. Phone calls and emails were just not the same. That probably had a lot to do with Jim’s spontaneous greeting.

Something in the way a particularly tall black man in a suite was looking around outside caught his attention. “I think they’re looking for you.”

“Who?” Jim asked following Blair’s gaze out the window towards the left side of the track where an temporary dance floor had been set up. His expression darkened as he realized that he’d probably be expected to start off the dance personally. Well he’d have to set them straight about that. “I gotta go,” he muttered after a quick kiss to Blair’s forehead.

“Bye,” Blair managed, shocked once again at the casual affection Jim showered on him. He’d turned back towards the window to look for Jim when the door opened behind him. “That didn’t take long,” Blair began as he turned around with a smile.

“Hello Blair.”


Blair found himself speechless for the third time that evening. “Patrick…”

“So Ellison.”

At that moment Blair would have gladly pummeled Jim if he’d still been present. Now that Patrick knew, he would get even more irritating in his attempts to get back together. Hadley always had been too damn competitive. He’d realized that even as naïve as he was back then. It was one of his ex-lover’s least attractive qualities.

“That was some kiss,” Patrick commented, taking a step closer.

Blair mentally scoffed at the outright lie. No, what shocked Patrick was that Jim had done it so casually and in public without any apparent calculation on the billionaire’s part. “I told you I was involved with someone.”

At least Blair thought he had said something about Jim, but he couldn’t really remember. All his recent encounters with Patrick had been too fraught with emotion or lust, for him to actually recall what exactly was said.


Jim maneuvered through the crowds with a polite smile on his face, his attention and more importantly his senses still back on the man he’d just left, as he made his way towards the dark figure prominently standing on the dais in the winner’s circle area.

He was unaware that his steps were in time to the heartbeat that had become part of the background noise whenever Blair was around. Perhaps it was why he tended to relax more under Sandburg’s calming aura.

The sudden increase in that “calming” beat made him stop in his tracks. Jim turned and looked up at the window of the gallery suite. The tinted windows took only milliseconds for his enhanced sight to laser through while at the same time he raised the dial on his hearing. “Patrick…” he heard Blair say.

Patrick? He focused his eyesight on the other figure in the room when he was suddenly blinded. “Damn it!” he cursed at the light that lanced through his head like a knife.

“Oh I’m so sorry,” the contrite woman began apologizing, the camera that had caused the agony hanging down by her side.

He covered his eyes with his right hand as he blinked furiously through the tears.

“Jim, are you all right?” Simon asked coming up to him.

“Take over, Simon. I’ll be upstairs.” Jim didn’t wait for Simon’s response but immediately headed back the way he’d come—the racing heartbeat drumming in his ears moving him to run.


Any good?” Patrick asked as he came closer.

Blair knew what he was asking but he wasn’t about to discuss his sex life with Jim.

“He’s tall…bet you enjoy’d riding his dick,” Patrick jeered; his green eyes dark with emotion.

He didn’t answer but something must have show in his expression. Blair had never been physically intimidated by Patrick’s six foot stature. Things had never gotten violent between them—something which looked like it was about to rapidly change.

“Patrick,” Blair began in a low soothing tone while he slowly turned his back away from the window. He really didn’t want to test the stress tolerance of the glass. “We broke up—“was all he managed before his words were swallowed by a tongue roughly thrusting inside.

He tried to move his head but it was caught in the vice of Patrick’s hands. A thigh was thrust between his legs preventing any kicks. Blair hands scrambled against the hard chest—pushing rather ineffectively against the larger man as he struggled to breathe.  He bit down on the tongue that roughly snaked between his lips.

Oww!”  Patrick jerked his face away from Blair but continued to hold the struggling man.  “What the hell, Blair?!”  He asked with a hurt expression on his face.  “I love you!”

Blair opened his mouth to reply when the door suddenly burst open.


Ellison’s motion forwards didn’t stop.  He had Blair separated from Hadley and Hadley pressed against the wall with his hands trussed up behind his back before Blair realized what had happened.

“Jim, wait,” Blair managed to cry when it looked like he was about to start beating the shit out of Patrick.

“What is your deal, Hadley…., ” the two voices overlapped, “It was a misunderstanding…Patrick...”

“Hadley.”  Jim stared from the pained expression on Hadley’s face to Blair’s anxious one.  “Patrick.”  And suddenly everything made sense.  He suddenly released the blond’s arms to face Blair.  “This is Patrick.”  The cool blue eyes spoke much more than words.  “And???”

“And what??  He tried to kiss me,” Blair defended.

“Like usual,” Patrick interjected while he straightened out his suit jacket—affronted apparently at the wrinkles now present.

“Shut up, Patrick!”  Ellison’s stance got even chillier at Blair’s shout.  His eyes flicked to Hadley before returning to the man standing two feet in front of him.  Blair began to fidget under his continued gaze.

 “Yes, shut up or I’ll be forced to shut you up.”  Jim’s eyes never left Blair’s as he calmly threatened the other man, the vein throbbing along his jawline the only indication of the precariousness of his emotional state.  Violence hung in the air tying them together in an uneasy sort of ménage a trois.

“Leave.”  Blair didn’t state a name, however, only an idiot would have not realized who the order was directed towards.  Patrick didn’t hesitate beyond an angry glance at James Ellison.

The slamming of the door, though loud, went unnoticed.

“Well?” Jim asked in a patient—no condescending stance; his arms crossed upon his chest.  He raised his right eyebrow as he waited.

“Well, what?” Blair tossed back.

“I rush up here and find you lip to lip—”

“You don’t understand…”

“How long have you been-- ?”

“I’m not interested in Patrick.  I’ve told him that.”

“Yeah, right.  Was that before or after?!”

“Jim,” Blair’s voice softened with guilt.  “I should have told you when Patrick first showed up.”

“First.  Why don’t you get right to the kissing.  There was kissing, right, shylock?  ‘Like usual’ your boyfriend said. Once. Twice.  Or did you fuck him?!”

“No!!”  Blair pushed against Jim with both hands.  Jim’s arms uncrossed to defend himself, grabbing Blair’s upper biceps to stop him from pushing him backwards.  “He wants to get back together…he doesn’t understand…”

Jim laughed in derision.  “It looks like he understands very well.  It seems I’m the schmuck, here.”  He thrust Blair away from him and strode towards the door.

“Jim, come on,” Blair said after him.

“Good luck with Hadley,” Jim tossed over his shoulder as he walked through the door.



Blair let himself into his apartment and softly closed the door.  He tossed his jacket on the back of the couch on his way towards the balcony.  Blair shivered once outside although it was a warm night.  The water shimmered under the moonlight in silent rebuke of his mistakes.

He’d messed up.  Jim was gone.  He wasn’t returning his phone calls, and he couldn’t really blame him.  Due to his indecision; responding to Patrick—those damn kisses.  He stared up at the moon and wondered exactly when he’d lost his mind.  Fixing this seemed to be impossible, but he loved Jim too much to not try.




Story Notes::: Yes it ends in a cliffhanger, but as such it remains that there is still another story to come in the Lawyer Blair Series.  Will Jim come back to Blair?  Stay tuned.  Feedback appreciated.